- 5/23/11 /
- Comment
Celebrity Apprentice Recap: Tom Scharpling’s Epic Take on the Finale
Trump capriciously chooses between Marlee Matlin and John Rich, and Tom has a lot to get off his chest.
Tom Scharpling Archive
- 5/16/11 /
- Comment
Celebrity Apprentice Recap: Tom Scharpling on the Final Two
It's hard to get worked up about a final task that involves Dee Snider.
- 5/9/11 /
- Comment
Celebrity Apprentice Recap: Tom Scharpling Wonders If Meat Loaf Is Emotional or Unbalanced
His constant weeping is touching in a way, but then tips over into insanity, especially when he recites an ode to Trump.
- 5/2/11 /
- Comment
The Celebrity Apprentice Recap: Tom Scharpling on Bin Laden’s Death Trumping the NeNe/Star Nonsense
"The gulf between Donald Trump’s faux-populist bullying and the iron will it takes to actually run the country has never seemed so massive."
- 4/25/11 /
- Comment
Celebrity Apprentice Recap: Tom Scharpling on the Worst Task Ever
Teams are forced to shill for Trump himself for two hours, and none do it well.
- 4/18/11 /
- Comment
Celebrity Apprentice Recap: Tom Scharpling on the Gary Busey Debacle
"I know that Busey suffered drastic head trauma after his horrible motorcycle accident and he’s not all there, but he is also a dick."
- 4/11/11 /
- Comment
Celebrity Apprentice Recap: Tom Scharpling on the Unraveling of La Toya
She responds to budget constrictions by basically saying, “Daddy, I want an Oompa Loompa! I want you to get me an Oompa Loompa right away!”
- 4/4/11 /
- Comment
The Celebrity Apprentice Recap: Tom Scharpling Marvels at the Meat Loaf Meltdown
When Phil Rizzuto said “we got a real pressure cooker going here” in “Paradise by the Dashboard Light," he was talking about the empty overheating cauldron socked squarely between Meat Loaf’s ears.
- 3/28/11 /
- Comment
Celebrity Apprentice Recap: Tom Scharpling Warms Up to NeNe, the Warwick Slayer
Only one woman is brave enough to stand up to the evil way-to–San Jose–knower.
- 3/21/11 /
- Comment
Celebrity Apprentice Recap: Tom Scharpling Says Dionne Warwick Is Not What Friends Are For
You were not drafted to be on this show, Dionne. The Dell Dude would’ve filled your seat with an enthusiasm that would’ve made our hearts sing!