Jesse Morrison, a 29-year-old film major in Memphis, was just fired from his job as a projectionist for using his access to write an early dis of The Fantastic Four sequel on fanboy haven Ain't It Cool News. (AICN responded in the site’s own inimitable fashion: “Have I mentioned yet that 20th Century Fox can go fuck themselves?") Perhaps 20th Century Fox is unusually sensitive because they just announced a spin-off sequel for the Surfer himself. But it seems foolish for Fox (or the movie chain) to punish Morrison; writing with the pseudonym Memflix, he actually liked the Surfer character, unlike most critics, who have struggled to even describe him:

“A featureless creature that resembles a shopping-mall mannequin.” —David Germain, AP

“An iridescent shop mannequin or a wicked-cool hood ornament.” —Justin Chang, Variety

“Looks like the penguin in Surf's Up if the penguin were a human, and silver.” —Michael Phillips, Chicago Tribune

“A giant silver eunuch on a radioactive surfboard!” —Scott Foundas, LA Weekly

—Logan Hill