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McDonough Fights Back: Minority Report's Neal McDonough will play M. Bison in the upcoming Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li video-game adaptation for Fox. He joins Smallville's Kristin Kreuk (Chun-Li) and a slew of other bizarro Street Fighter look-alikes including Michael Clarke Duncan as Balrog the boxer. [HR]
Brown Takes the Stand: Sandra Brown has finally caved. After 56 New York Times best-sellers, more than 70 million books in print, and years of begging by everyone in Hollywood, Brown has sold the rights to one of her books: 1996's legal thriller, The Witness. Says Brown, "For decades, I've been developing a voice my readers recognize and expect. [TwinStar's] Lane Bishop approached me with a full understanding and appreciation of that voice." In other words, "I make a boatload of money from these books, so please don't ruin this for me." [HR]
Monahan to Thrill Paramount: The Departed scribe William Monahan will write a "fact-based thriller" based on an article that will soon appear in Playboy magazine. The true story centers on a drug dealer who ducks his prison time by going undercover at an insane asylum, where he tries to get a serial killer to divulge the locations of his victims. Spoiler alert: He probably ate them. [Variety]
Zeta-Jones Will Seduce You: Catherine Zeta-Jones-Douglas will star in an untitled romantic comedy for writer-director Bart Freundlich, helmer of Trust the Man starring wife Julianne Moore. Zeta-Jones will play a single mom living in Manhattan who starts a fling with her much-younger neighbor. Yikes — she'll have to dig deep into her acting soul to make that age-gap romance convincing. [HR]
Marshall Drives for Uni: Doomsday's Neil Marshall will direct Universal's Drive, for producer Marc Platt. Hugh Jackman is attached as a movie stunt driver who moonlights as a getaway driver for robberies. Marshall says he wants to bring the film a "British sensibility," which means all the car chases will have to be rewritten on the other side of the road. [Variety]
CSI: Magic Mountain: The newest CSI will eschew a city setting in favor of Six Flags Magic Mountain. CSI: Live! will show audiences a crime and let them solve it with a cast of embarrassingly peppy detectives. According to CBS' Liz Kalodner, "it will be a family-friendly show." What, no black-light semen? [Variety]
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Boeing-Boeing Comes Out of Storage
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Week in Review: Comment No. 388