"I don’t think you can fake anything onstage but if you could fake an author I think he’d be a good one to fake. Because everyone in the audience is having trouble too! So you can kind of join forces with them. They come back and say, 'God, this is hard to understand.' And I say, 'No shit, Dick Tracy.'" —Elaine Stritch, star of BAM's Endgame, on Samuel Beckett [Gothamist]

"I think a lot of Canadian rappers pretend to be something they're not. I feel like when you try to do something like that, people will see through it pretty quickly. I don't think I look like any of the guys on The Wire. I don't think I could keep that up for very long, so why even try? Don't get me wrong, I love the same thug shit as any other rapper. But if I ever do Cribs, I'm probably not going to have a big Scarface poster above my bed, or Scarface bed sheets." —Canadian rapper Cadence Weapon [A.V. Club]

"For me, it tends to disappear, which is good, because, you know, I've just been playing Othello, and I'm not prone to psychopathic, jealous rages, which is fortunate." —Chiwetel Ejiofor on Method acting [A.V. Club]

"When you're in bed, and you're married to someone, don't fart under the covers and trap her under the covers, because she gets pissed." —Ashton Kutcher on how Demi is no fan of the Dutch oven [MTV]

"I decided on [the title] L.A.X. because that's the major airport here. I figured people fly into LAX coming and going. I consider myself like that airport, because anything coming through and leaving California gotta come through me." —The Game, basically guaranteeing that his upcoming album will be delayed [MTV]