
Photo: Getty Images; Photo illustration the fault of: Dan Kois
That's right! While lesser competitors are satisfied with presenting films in three measly dimensions, the Jonas Brothers' relentless commitment to pure, white-hot quality will not allow them to release such piffle into the marketplace. Teams of Jonas-funded super-scientists are currently hard at work in Jonas HQ in Wyckoff, New Jersey, demolishing the time-space continuum in search of four additional dimensions to insert into the film, which will include footage from their upcoming "Burning Up" concert tour, in addition to behind-the-scenes documentary material of the Brothers' plotting world domination. While the work is grueling — just last week four Nobel Prize–winning physicists were sucked into a wormhole, their screams echoing even louder than the cracking whips of Team Jonas' masked masters of motivation — no one minds, for to please the Brothers today is to assure one's safety in the Jonas-led America of tomorrow.
Jonas Brothers in 3-D Disney feature [HR]
Earlier: Disney Unleashes the Jonas Brothers Upon a Terrified Populace
Know Your Jonas Brothers Overlords
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