Parker Joins the Ivy League: Now that the Sex and the City movie/Cosmo parties are over, Sarah Jessica Parker has decided to finally get on with her life by starring in The Ivy Chronicles for Warner Bros. Eager to distance herself from Carrie Bradshaw, she's in negotiations to play "a single woman in contemporary New York." Does anyone know the emoticon for dumbfounded blank stare? [HR]

Quinn and Hauer Get Motorin': ABC's Prince of Motor City is proving to be a veritable Katamari Damacy of a pilot; it just keeps picking up new talent wherever it goes, adding Aidan Quinn and Rutger Hauer to its already impressive lineup. As you may recall, it's been described as Hamlet in Detroit — easily accomplished, because something is already rotten there: Gary Sheffield's .234 batting average! [HR]

Mulgrew Rides Again: Kate "Captain Janeway" Mulgrew will next be seen in the Broadway revival of Equus. Let's hope she responds more calmly to Harry Potter's wang than Voldemort does. [Playbill]

Mandate Gets Close to Zaillian: Mandate Pictures has purchased Close Far Away from Swedish photojournalist Jens Assur, for writer-director Steven Zaillian to produce. Set all over the world, story follows "several characters put into vulnerable situations whose actions carry global consequences," which coincidentally is the exact same logline for Babel 2, X-Men 4, and every Robert Ludlum book ever. [HR]

Walden's Folly?: Walden Media has picked up the true story of a team of men and sled dogs who braved frigid temperatures to save an Alaskan town from an epidemic in 1925, called, um, The Cruelest Miles: The Heroic Story of Dogs and Men in a Race Against an Epidemic. That title makes us wish the true story were about men racing against the dogs- — may the best species win — and when the dogs bark they shoot lasers, and also there are arctic killer robots. Damn you, true stories! [Variety]