Dear Diary: Why Does the Game Disappoint Us So?
8/27/08 at 4:00 PM

"I'm only going over the rules one more time: We put a cookie in the center…"Photo: Kate Glicksberg
10:03 p.m.: Young Joc starts things off with “It’s Going Down.” Huh. Okay, sure, Young Joc. Irv Gotti looks happy, at least.
10:10 p.m.: The Game brings out Joe Budden. Pair squash beef we were not previously aware of.
10:17 p.m.: Old-school MC Dana Dane kicks a verse off “Dana Dane With Fame” that includes cringe-inducing bit of “Japanese” gibberish. The Game informs us, giddily, that Dana just sort of showed up, uninvited. Awesome.
10:25 p.m.: Raekwon and Ghostface pop up. Although Rae does “Bulletproof Wallets” with the Game, Ghost just kind of hangs out.
10:37 p.m.: Fat Joe, looking not super fat, actually, proves most people still don’t care about Fat Joe.
10:45 p.m.: Maino makes one of his two guest appearances of the evening; he was also at the Young Jeezy show at the Blender Theater. Was there a guest-MC shuttle bus running?
10:50 p.m.: The big gun, we suppose: Young Buck, another former G-Unit artilleryman turned sworn 50 Cent enemy. Buck gifts the Game with a dazzling watch. This kind of thing is a bit awkward in public, we learn.
11 p.m.: The Game at least has the night’s best line, in a non sequitur: “Usain Bolt can’t fuck with me … tell dude to come catch me in Compton while I’m running from the cops.”
11:15 p.m.: With multiple entourages threatening to spill over the lip of the stage, Jim Jones caps the cavalcade of stars. Points for his Louis Vuitton head-scarf ensemble, but dude doesn’t say “baaalin’” even once. Dipset crony Freeky Zekey is not famous enough, apparently, to get a microphone.
TOTALS: Two guest MCs we care about, one of whom who does a song; countless derogatory remarks made in the direction of 50 Cent; zero shouts of baaalin’; seven, maybe eight, actual songs performed by the Game.
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