Well, the stock market is back up, which means the federal bailout worked, the economy is saved, and the world's rich can go back to dining on gold-plated lobsters and lighting their cigars with euros and such. Luckily, since we don't have any money, this week's minor fiscal apocalypse didn't affect us much, but how did our favorite entertainers cope?

R. Kelly collected a second income as a firefighter.

Popular musicians rallied to save the record business.

Amy Poehler got a better job.

Ben Silverman tried not to get fired from his.

Damien Hirst sold off all his dead animals.

Annie Proulx asked her fans to save their postage.

Ben Kingsley completely lost his mind.

(Also, R.I.P. David Foster Wallace.)