Popular soft-rock combo Coldplay will be in Los Angeles to perform "Viva la Vida" and lose to Robert Plant at the Grammys this weekend. Hilariously, guitar goblin Joe Satriani will also be there; the virtuosic still insists that he wrote the band's iTunes-advertising radio smash, reports Fox News' Roger Friedman. Says Satriani's attorney: "We have warned their British lawyers that we have hired a fleet of process servers lined up to dog the band everywhere they go this weekend in the hopes of serving them." We wish Satriani's army the best of luck recognizing anyone in the band besides Chris Martin.

Gwyneth's Hubby: Viva La Lawsuit [Fox News via Defamer]