Big-Screen Bazooka: Finally! Bazooka Joe, the bubble-gum comic strip that dates back to the fifties and is arguably the greatest narrative ever told via candy wrapper, is getting the big-screen treatment. Mark Hammer, who got in the studio door with an unproduced spec script called Sonny Takes to Peru, is writing the screenplay. For the occasion, the Hollywood Reporter provides probably their best-ever plot summary: “Joe, who wears an eye patch for reasons never explained, has child-friendly misadventures, sometime joined by a host of friends with the names Pesty, Mort (always with a turtleneck sweater pulled up over his mouth), Toughie, Hungry Herman, love interest Jane and a dog named Walkie Talkie.” [HR]
Brit Laughs: Neoclassics Films has acquired U.S. rights for the hit British comedy St. Trinian’s, and will distribute the film this summer. The movie, which grossed an eye-popping $25 million during its theatrical run, revolves around a dysfunctional all-girls boarding school, including its wacky parents and faculty. Yeah, we were surprised they didn’t just remake it, too, but we’re assuming the movie — which features familiar faces like Colin Firth, Rupert Everett, and Russell Brand — doesn’t have much talking or something. [Variety]
The Magnificent Irvine: Trainspotting author Irvine Welsh, who recently directed his first feature film, Good Arrows, will next helm soccer comedy The Magnificent Eleven. Welsh will co-write the next draft of the screenplay for the film — a take on The Magnificent Seven revolving around an amateur soccer team, a Tandoori restaurant, and some local toughs — with father-son team Pete and John Adams. And with these last two items, you now know more about British cinema than you surely ever, ever cared to. [Variety]
New Music Day: Two R&B heavyweights announced the titles and approximate release dates for their new album yesterday, and, in the process, also revealed a little bit about themselves. While Usher went the one-sentence-press-release route to let us know about this fall’s Monster, Mariah Carey tweeted her news: “Bcuz I Love U, I want u to be the first to know the title of my new album ‘Memoirs of an Imperfect Angel’ Its very personal & dedicated to u.” Dedicated to us! It’s also due in the fall. [Billboard]
