We don't know! Michael Riedel reports today that chronic absenteeism by cast members of Broadway's West Side Story has been so bad that poor 91-year-old director Arthur Laurents was forced last week to yell at his actors (whichever ones happened to be there that day, anyway). Citing injuries, sickness, and vocal problems, chorus members and leads — like Matt Cavenaugh and Josefina Scaglione (who play Tony and Maria) — have repeatedly skipped performances. Riedel says the most frequent absentee is Anita-playing Karen Olivo, who was missing for days after she won her Tony in June. But at least she had a good excuse!

'West Side' Substitutes [NYP]