Here's our not-quite-automated guide to New York's feature stories. In "Rocky's Family Horror Show," Logan Hill looks at "Rocky" Aoki, the Benihana entrepreneur, and his kaleidoscopic mess of a family.

Keywords: Money; mistresses; Hawaii Five-O; saketini; money; insider trading; Japanese food; money.

The details: Rocky Aoki, a man whose over-the-top gaudiness makes Donald Trump look like Martha Stewart, built an empire out of cheesy eateries that peddle Japanese cuisine as a knife-twirling minstrel show. Now four of his six kids are trying to wrest control of the business from him, he's suing them, and all of it unfolds among some of the kitschiest furnishings you'll ever see.

Crucial quote: "Before his accident, Rocky boasts, he had 'three kids from three different women at exactly the same time' — though he only found out about the third via a paternity suit."

Takeaway: When you raise your spawn like Rocky did — encouraging greed and competition and openly picking favorites — do not be surprised when the kiddies start feuding with each other. Or even sharpening knives for you.

Read the full article here — and the full issue here.