• Gray Matters screening. IFC Center, 323 Sixth Ave., nr W. 3rd St. Stars Heather Graham, Tom Cavanagh, Bridget Moynahan, Alan Cumming, Molly Shannon, and Sissy Spacek are expected along with Parker Posey, Jane Krakowski, and Rachel Dratch. Gray Matters is a drama about solving perplexing brainteasers while bowling. (Note: Plot synopsis derived entirely from speculation based on this photo. It's actually about siblings trying to find love.)

• Birthday party for Michael Satsky. Stereo, 512 W. 29th St., nr. Tenth Ave., 11 p.m. Michael Satsky is one of Stereo's co-owners. Expected guests include Damien Fahey and … and … AND VANILLA FREAKING ICE!!!

• Ghost Rider premiere. Regal E-Walk Theater, 247 W. 42nd St., nr. Eighth Ave., 7 p.m. Headliner Nicolas Cage will be walking the e-walk. What's an e-walk? Who cares? More things should have random names that make no sense. We're renaming this column "J.W. Pudnick's Haberdashery."

Or check out our Agenda listings for tonight, selected by New York's culture editors.