• In another proof that post-9/11 airport security is a lot like pre-9/11 airport security, except with more badges, a passenger van was discovered driving on a JFK runway. The guards apparently simply waved it past the gates. [WNBC]
• We've gone a full three weeks without being properly outraged by something someone said on the radio. How about a homeless man goaded by "Opie and Anthony" into saying he'd like to rape Condoleezza Rice, Laura Bush, and Queen Elizabeth? Will that do? [NYDN]
• The Times serves up another "something cool's about to happen to NYC transit, unless it won't" item. The tortured peg: Tomorrow, parts of a giant drill will arrive in Newark, which, once assembled, will be used (next year) to dig a tunnel that will connect LIRR to Grand Central. Yay drill! [NYT]
• Finally, an animal-torture scandal with Anna Wintour at the center! Apparently, the live peacocks used as decorations at the Met's Costume Institute gala were "fearing for their lives." As were half the guests. [NYP]
• And, since the very idea of protest is hilarious, hope you enjoyed not one but two "Free Paris Hilton" rallies in Manhattan yesterday. There were eight actual mock-picketers, but "the media turnout was out of control" and "the online support has been tremendous." We're sure. [amNY]