E Pluribus, Man Band

Chris KirkpatrickPhoto: Getty Images
We cornered Chris Kirkpatrick, former 'N Sync'er, and asked him the only logical question: Do those insipid lyrics ever work on women? The answer was no, mostly, but he admitted that hidden somewhere in his lyrical catalog was one successful pickup line he first used and then later turned into song, from his post-Sync solo career. What song? He didn't say. But after a visit to Kirkpatrick.nu, “your source for everything Chris Kirkpatrick,” we offer the following three most likely possibilities:
“What makes me happy / Fills me up with glee / Those bones in my jaw that don't have a flaw / My shiny teeth and me.” —“My Shiny Teeth and Me,” performed for Nickelodeon's Fairly OddParents“Jodi wishes she could be a porn star / Taking all her clothes off in L.A./ Jodi wishes she could be a porn star / Going down for money / Going down for fame.” —“Jodi's Song”
“Hey Vicky you're so so icky / Just the thought of being around you makes me oh so sicky.” —“Icky Vicky,” Fairly OddParents
We really hope it's that last one. —Marc Tracy

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