• Save the Children 75th Anniversary Celebration. Avery Fisher Hall, Lincoln Center, 6 p.m. Expected: Bill Clinton, George Bush Sr., Melinda Gates, Samuel L. Jackson, and more. Maybe it’s still too soon to revive a certain movie-based joke meme from last summer, but we don’t care — we just want these motherfucking snakes out of this motherfucking fund-raiser!!!

• In the Valley of Elah screening and charity auction. Loews Lincoln Center, 1998 Broadway, nr. 68th St., 8 p.m. Auction to benefit the Accompanied Literary Society afterward at Jour et Nuit, 8 W. 58th St., nr. Fifth Ave. Expected guests include Paul Haggis (the movie’s director), Itzhak Perlman, Penélope Cruz, Martin Sheen, Naomi Watts, Liev Schreiber, and more. Elah is the biblical location where David fought Goliath; the movie is a modern-day reimagining of the story in which Penélope Cruz plays a sexy slingshot with a heart of gold.