ink-stained wretches

Who Hasn’t Had Sex With Alan Cumming?

Alan Cumming

Alan Cumming loves himself a journalist.Photo: WireImage

Last month at the Condé Nast Traveler Awards, actor Alan Cumming told a little story about how he once missed a flight because he was at his hotel in New York, having sex with a journalist who had just interviewed him. Reeeeeeally, we said to ourselves. Who could it have been? We tossed out a few guesses: Was it the journalist to whom Cumming said, “You’re into your cock, aren’t you?” The one who began his profile by saying, “I like Alan Cumming. I like him”? Or the Newsday writer who lingered lustily over Cummings’s physical description? No, no, and no. “The thing is I enjoy New York Magazine online trying to work out who that person might be,” Cumming told us last night at the Ace Accessories Awards. “They’re all wrong so far, though, I have to say.”

Coincidentally, we also got an e-mail this morning from Newsday’s Patrick Pacheco, who denied that he’d had sex with that man. “I should think that as a celebrity — and as someone who cuts a fine figure in a kilt — he could certainly do a lot better than an ink-stained wretch,” he wrote. But can he? Since our initial query, we have confirmed reports of not one, not two, but definitely three and possibly four New York–based journalists who have had some sort of carnal relations with Cumming. And none of them was the one in the original story! Which might mean, and tell us if we’re wrong here, that Alan Cumming is a real-life Media Whore. Awesome! “I’m never going to say who [it was],” Cumming told New York last night. But we’re dying to know, who else out there has spritzed on the Cumming cologne? This, ladies and gentlemen, are what Comments are made for.

Earlier: Who Had Sex With Alan Cumming?

Who Hasn’t Had Sex With Alan Cumming?