Wrap your minds around this one: Rudy Giuliani’s breakup with Donna Hanover cost more to taxpayers than his affair with Judith Nathan. Today’s Post (which won’t let the Murdochian fantasy of a Giuliani White House stand in a way of a nasty news brief — now that’s integrity) does the math: As the city’s first family crumbled, Rudy may have hidden his trips to tryst with Nathan in his transportation expenses — but the “distraught” Hanover racked up $110,000 in city bills shuttling between her California relatives' homes and Gracie Mansion. Of course, Donna flew on her own dime; she was, however, shadowed by an NYPD security detail that ran up the tab. In June 2000, Hanover traveled to her parents’ house every weekend, with the cops dutifully on her tail; the somewhat squeaky logic here is that, if Giuliani wasn’t such a cheating bastard, his wife wouldn’t have to travel so much. Um, sure, and if Donna smoked cigars, he wouldn’t have met Judith in a cigar bar. That’s the beauty of multiple “if”s. Still, since we’re counting secondary and tertiary effects of Rudy’s philandering, does this mean we can sue him for inflicting on us Donna Hanover’s performance in The Vagina Monologues? —Michael Idov

Rudy’s Ex in 2nd $oaking [NYP]