Madonna and Guy Richie may or may not be breaking up because Madonna "lost respect" for Richie when she found out he embellished his working-class roots. The upside: She may be moving to NYC! Matt Lauer has foolishly agreed to be roasted by the Friar's Club. Donatella Versace is appearing at Barneys today to tout her menswear line. Foxy Hillary Clinton aide Huma Abedin and Representative Anthony Weiner totally acted like a couple during David Paterson's swearing-in ceremony in Albany yesterday. Mary-Louise Parker is bad at giving directions to people in the West Village, even though she lives there. Cindy Adams thinks both Andrew Cuomo and Michael Bloomberg will make runs for governor.

Lindsay Lohan's 35-year-old pal Jeremy Geffen (no relation to David) was arrested for allegedly assaulting two 16-year-old girls. Will Smith, Jada Pinkett, and Kimora Lee Simmons all deny Radar magazine's claim that they are active Scientologists. Halle Berry spent $600,000 outfitting nurseries for her baby in three different homes. Brandon Davis was thrown out of Lauren Conrad's fashion show at an L.A. club for "screaming and yelling and waving around a bag of white powder." Twenty-three-year-old Meghan McCain hates being hit on by investment bankers but likes swearing, guys with tattoos, and Bud Light. British Food Network chef Nigella Lawson has supposedly gained so much weight that the director won't show her from the waist down anymore. Gnarls Barkley single "Run" was banned from MTV for causing epileptic seizures. David Lauren and MSNBC's Dan Abrams hung out in Atlantic City together. Project Runway winner Christian Siriano has become really popular in Hollywood. Rudy Giuliani shopped for opera CDs. Liz Smith thinks former sex prosecutor Linda Farstein's latest book is her best yet.