Carl Icahn has written one of his poison-pen letters to Yahoo's chairman of the board, Roy Bostock, urging him to sell to Microsoft or else. While Bostock and his board were all busy "completely botching" the Microsoft deal, Icahn tells the chairman, he went and acquired a controlling stake in the company and ginned up a list of potential candidates for a replacement board, he says, among other niceties, and, well, it's safe to say that someone is going to be crying into his pillow tonight.

It is clear to me that the board of directors of Yahoo has acted irrationally and lost the faith of shareholders and Microsoft. It is quite obvious that Microsoft’s bid of $33 per share is a superior alternative to Yahoo’s prospects on a standalone basis. I am perplexed by the board’s actions. It is irresponsible to hide behind management’s more than overly optimistic financial forecasts. It is unconscionable that you have not allowed your shareholders to choose to accept an offer that represented a 72% premium over Yahoo’s closing price of $19.18 on the day before the initial Microsoft offer.

Of course, he doesn't really want to do all of those mean things, Icahn adds. It can totally be avoided! All Bostock has to do is to basically be his bitch. Now you have a nice day, Roy!

Icahn Says Yahoo ‘Completely Botched’ Microsoft Talks [NYT/DealBook]