How Can John McCain's Appearance on ‘SNL’ Go Awry? Let Us Count the Ways

Photo Illustration: Everett Bogue; Photos: Getty Images, Courtesy NBC
Poehler: Really, China and Burma? You thought your devastating natural disasters could distract American media from the Democratic primary? Next time try a little harder, guys. Really.
McCain: Really, Life Alert? You really just have to push a button and help magically appears? Really?
Seth Meyers: Really, Vito Fossella? You think you can run for reelection and win? Really? The only thing about you with staying power these days is your baby-making machinery. Really.
McCain: Really, Cindy? You really think you're not a cunty painted trollop? Really? Why did you think I married you?
Poehler: Wow. Really? You went there?
McCain: Really.
Meyers: Ha! Ha! Um, anyway. Really, Gwyneth Paltrow? You think we still really want to see your legs? To America you're just another British nanny now. Really.
Poehler: Really, Knicks? You really think a dude with a mustache from Phoenix can take over Isiah Thomas's team and make it work? He's white. Really!
McCain: Ha! Really, Democrats? You think a dude from Illinois can take over your race and make it work? He's —
Meyers: A freshman senator! Really.
McCain: Wait, you can make a joke about someone being white, but you can't make one about him being black? Really?
Meyers: Really.
Poehler: Ha-ha! Hey, Senator McCain, Israel celebrated its 60th birthday this month. Are you really older than them? Really?
McCain: Really.
Poehler: And you're really older than FM radio and the Golden Gate Bridge? Really?
McCain: Yes, really.
Poehler: Wait, and you're older than Dick Cheney? Really? Wasn't everyone worried he was too old and frail to assume the presidency?
McCain: Really? Is it true that you are a stringy-haired, overhyped, less funny version of Tina Fey? Because that's what I heard. Really.
Meyers: Whoa! That was really harsh. Really. Moving on. Really, Alec Baldwin, you really want us to believe you'd run for public office? If your daughter is a little pig, what's a Republican? Really?!
McCain: Really, Seth Meyers? You really want us to believe you've ever come face-to-face with a vagina in your life? Really?
Poehler: This segment is really, really over. Really.

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