When someone sends you a Website link along with the descriptor “Creepy Neighbor Martha With Her Tame Midget Cows,” you click on it immediately and without question. There is no other response. So that’s exactly what we did when senior news editor Jessica Coen IMed us a link to Martha Stewart’s highly entertaining blog earlier today, and we were not disappointed.

See, Martha’s neighbors asked her to cattle-sit their two miniature Hereford cows while they’re away for the summer. This is no problem for Martha, who already has a farm. She just tossed them in the backyard with her miniature donkeys. Yet she still can’t figure out what to name them, and she needs your help, America. Martha is putting the naming to a vote on her site, and she already has several suggestions: Napoleon and Josephine, Maggie and Thatcher, Sir Loin and Madame Bovine, Isabel and Ferdinand, Hillary and Barack, Jen and Ben. There are more choices, but you should go see them for yourself, along with the pictures of the mini-cows, which need to be experienced in person. After the jump, we spend way more time than was necessary debating over IM what Martha Stewart should name her cattle.