"Page Six" says Samantha Ronson and Lindsay Lohan had to bail on Ronson's 31st-birthday party at the Bowery Hotel because there were too many paparazzi. But aren't there always paparazzi outside that hotel? If you want to avoid photographers, throw your birthday party at Lolita, or something, like everyone else. Oprah Winfrey is allegedly tired of appearing on the cover of O magazine, and gave her editors six months to find a suitable replacement. VH1's Camp Cougar, hosted by Lisa Gastineau, started filming in Manhattan yesterday. David Wright's girlfriend, Molly Beers, is the new "Frock Couture" model on the company's Website. Man, she's pretty — but not good enough for him because NOBODY IS. Mary-Kate Olsen looked like a "pauper" while buying wine at Bowery and Vine liquor store. CRAZY blind item: What bitter Olympian spiked her teammate's protein shake with laxatives before a big competition? (It didn't work.)

Bill Clinton celebrated his 62nd birthday in Vegas by having dinner at Craftsteak in the MGM Grand and then checking out Cher at Caesars Palace. (He also had dinner with Hillary, Chelsea, and her boyfriend at Allegretti on West 22nd Street on Tuesday, his actual birthday.) LL Cool J has a new President Bush–dis track out. Courtenay Semel, Tila Tequila's girlfriend, spent the night in jail in Vegas after getting into a drunken altercation with a security guard at a nightclub. Ben Affleck will be in Denver for the DNC, but only to participate in a "disabled veterans' poker tournament" and to sit in on a global-poverty forum. Dick Butkus thinks the current crop of NFL players is a bunch of showboating softies. Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake may have recorded their long-awaited duet together at Timbaland's studio in Virginia Beach. Singers like Elton John and Kylie Minogue are all performing in Dubai because they get paid a lot of money. Nike has hired Don King to hype the (let's hope inevitable) showdown between Roger Federer and Rafael Nadal at the upcoming U.S. Open.