"David, I love you," a fan shouted during David Paterson's speech yesterday at the DNC. "There's my past, come back to haunt me again," the governor quipped, awesomely. Keith Olbermann allegedly told his bosses at MSNBC that he's not going to the RNC in St. Paul unless they beef up his security. ("Page Six" claims that he thinks he's gonna be assassinated.) Adrian Grenier tried to convince Entourage producers to let Vinny Chase sell his Hummer and buy a Prius, but they wouldn't listen to him. Dick Cheney has gone from a size 48 regular to a 44, which is a 40-pound drop. Criss Angel hypnotized the 8-year-old son of UFC president Dana White because the kid was having nightmares about "monsters under his bed." It worked.

Moby complained that a "petite blonde" friend of his was wrestled to the ground by convention security guards just because she left her credentials in her hotel room. Real reporters are complaining that fake reporter Luke Russert is being given star treatment by NBC. (He was driving around the Pepsi Center on a golf cart; they had to walk.) Vin Diesel's new movie, Babylon A.D., is really bad. Bobby Kennedy Jr. won't say whether he's planning on running for office. Diddy has supposedly been prepping Danity Kane member Dawn Richard for a solo career, which pissed off the other members enough that they didn't attend her birthday party. Sean Penn says he "will reluctantly vote for Obama," though he's really a Ralph Nader guy. Michael Jackson plans to celebrate his 50th birthday by watching cartoons with his kids. Kevin Connolly paid for a bachelorette party's drinks, and also posed for pix and kissed the bride. John Mayer hung out at the Chelsea Hotel in Atlantic City. Homer Simpson is getting a colonoscopy. Cindy Adams, on Charles Barkley's reaction after running into Charlize Theron at the DNC: "Oooohhh. Man, that's ghetto, for I dig her."