We’re Sorry, But Palin Baby Daddy Levi Johnston Is Sex on Skates

We sense a rise in the polls.Photo: MySpace
We have a different question: HOW HOT IS THE BABY DADDY? Eighteen-year-old Levi Johnston is a hockey star and high-school classmate of Bristol Palin. They'd been dating a while, and now with the whole pregnancy thing are planning on getting married. Look at that face. John McCain is definitely winning the cougar vote now, on top of the Jamie-Lynn Spears vote.
Johnston is basically the quintessential example of that guy who you are constantly worried is going to impregnate your daughter (and occasionally does). He's a handsome stud, an athletic star, and he has a criminal record. (For illegally fishing some Alaskan king salmon from Moose Lake out of season. Best crime ever!) He even has a fake blog already (Sample headline: "ABORT! ABORT! ABORT!"). Plus, he described himself as a "fuckin' redneck" on his now-defunct MySpace page, which is basically the truest combination of two words anyone has made during this whole campaign. Dude, Honest Abe himself would want this guy in the Lincoln bedroom.
Related: Levi Johnston and Fat Girlfriend Arrive in St. Paul [NYM]
Levi ‘Sex on Skates’ Johnston Is Already in St. Paul for Republican Convention [NYM]
Defending Sarah Palin: Ross Douthat and Jonah Goldberg on McCain's V.P. Pick as Culture-War Hand Grenade [NYM]
Sarah Palin Jokes: Is McCain's V.P. Making Politics Funny Again? [NYM]
Plus: Reactions to Palin's vetting process are rounded up here.
Disclosures on Palin Raise Questions on Vetting Process [NYT]

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