Before he was named the Biggest Loser in Bernie Madoff's scam, Fairfield Greenwich Group founder Walter A. Noel was apparently famous in Greenwich for two things: Being "a terribly good person, almost in the sense of Jimmy Stewart in It’s a Wonderful Life combined with an overtone of Gregory Peck in To Kill a Mockingbird” according to family friend George L. Ball; and being the owner of the loins from which sprung five total babes, according to the Times, which put it a bit differently:

The Noels were perhaps best known among associates for their Christmas cards — “the people with five stunning girls,” in the words of a family friend.

Indeed. Internet stalking reveals that the offspring of Walter and Monica Noel are not just stunning, but have also led stunningly perfect existences. "The toasts of Greenwich," as Vanity Fair called them in a 2002 profile, are all impressively "well dressed, well educated (Harvard, Yale, Brown, and Georgetown) and well-married" to well-bred foreign spouses, all of whom currently work for the Fairfield Greenwich group. They also are all very well-toned. None of them is even warty! As you can see from our slideshow of the Fabulous Noel sisters, at right, these women's lives were insanely enviable. Until, of course, last week.