Nineteen-year-old Douglas Allen had a bit of a crime spree in September. One night, he and a friend snatched a purse. Allen celebrated by going to a belly-dancing bar in Hell's Kitchen (probably this one) and stealing a laptop, iPod, digital camera, and cash from there. Since it was such a warm, comfortable place (all those cushiony pillows and pillowy breasts, you know), he fell asleep in a corner and was unnoticed by the staff. They locked up the place, unaware of the thefts or the thief. Reports the Post's police blotter:

He then allegedly helped himself to the items in the club, admitting he "cooked myself hamburgers, had some drinks, played with the cat and smoked some cigarettes," according to court papers.

Then he vacuumed the place and made napkin swans until the police came and arrested him.

NYPD DAILY BLOTTER [NYP]