Quick, name anyone that has ever served as surgeon general. Unless you've seen a lot of Life Alert commercials, you probably can't. But America won't have that problem anymore. Because according to reports, brain surgeon and Michael Moore debater Dr. Sanjay Gupta, the omnipotent contributor to CNN, CBS, and Time magazine, has been tapped by Barack Obama to take over the post. He'll soon be in charge of warning pregnant women of the dangers of smoking … and, we assume, some other responsibilities. Weird. [CNN]