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It's bad enough for Bernie Madoff to be locked away for the rest of his mortal life before then being sent to hell for all eternity, but then he maybe gets cancer (but probably not), and now he has even more bad things coming his way. His former lover and Ponzi-scheme victim Sheryl Weinstein tells the AP that she'll be sending Madoff a copy of her book. If the prison bubble has so far shielded him from realizing that the whole world is mocking his penis, that will end soon. [1010Wins]