A review of Bernie Madoff's customer accounts by federal prosecutors has revealed that around 50 percent of Bernie's victims didn't lose any money to Bernie Madoff's Ponzi scheme, just the returns that they thought they were accruing on their original investment. In fact, they technically made money since, over time, they withdrew more than they originally invested. We're not sure, but we think this might mean that Bernie Madoff is 50 percent less evil. Like, he's still half-Satan, but he's also just half the guy who takes an extra stack of $500 bills during Monopoly. [NYT]