His one-liners were scripted and lame ("I’ve been a conservative all my life, but I know that if I want to do well in the cha-cha, I’m going to have to vote with the Republicans and party with the Democrats") and his actual dance skills were wanting ("You're working it for the older crowd!" one judge praised him, weakly), but still, former House majority leader Tom Delay's debut on last night's Dancing With the Stars — in which he wore what looked like a UPS uniform with a leopard-trimmed vest and mouthed the words to "Wild Thing" to partner Cheryl Burke — was everything we expected it to be and more. Warning: In the video, there are not one, but two close-up booty shots.