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Jessica Simpson Is Like ‘a Drug’ … in Bed

Marc Jacobs doesn’t want any celebrities at his show this year, nor did he want Madonna there last year. “She came backstage, and I was like, ‘What do you do with her now?’ Because it’s not like she was invited. She just called and said she was coming, and we weren’t holding the show for her. She just came, and that was it.” After splitting with 23-year-old Jesus Luz, Madonna upped her game and is going after 24-year-old Basque model Jon Kortajarena, whom she met at the New York premiere of A Single Man. And never one to kiss and tell, John Mayer gushes that Jessica Simpson was “crazy” in bed, describing her as “a drug … and drugs aren’t good for you if you do lots of them. Yeah, that girl is like crack cocaine to me.”

Donna Karan put up with noise complaints from West Village neighbors as she hosted a Haiti fund-raiser at her Urban Zen Studios, with performances from Mary J Blige and Wyclef Jean, and entertained guests like Anna Wintour, Tory Burch, and Carolina Herrera, then joined Jay-Z, Tinsley Mortimer, Patti Smith, and Rachel Zoe for an after-party at the Standard. Anna Wintour mentioned that she’d like to see natural blonde Maggie Rizer as a redhead, so Rizer’s dying her hair red today. Angelina Jolie is heading to Haiti to grace earthquake victims with her ethereal presence. At the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Models gala last night, cover girl Brooklyn Decker clarified that she wasn’t named after the New York borough, but rather a horse named Brook. Mark Sanchez was “all about” Kristin Cavallari in Miami, where the pair partied at Maxim’s bash and left together at the end of the night. Nick Jonas says he has a five-step, foolproof plan for wooing women, because surely being a teen heartthrob has nothing to do with his romantic success.

Donald Trump is getting sued by Greek shipping heir Harry Theodoracopulos, who says he was unjustly banned from Trump’s West Palm Beach golf course. Trump, however, claims he was abusive toward caddies and other members. Ivana, meanwhile, has been frolicking around St. Bart’s in a pink bikini. Paul Anka says he never threatened his estranged Swedish model wife with a gun, though she claims he did and recently filed a restraining order against him. Rumors were hitting the Internet that Samantha Ronson abused her sometimes girlfriend Lindsay Lohan, but LiLo cleared up the false claim via Twitter, and Ronson tweet-thanked her for it. Michael Lohan hasn’t paid Dina child support in a year. We are floored.

A bearded Bradley Cooper got a fake tan before the Valentine’s Day premiere but then shaved, resulting in a two-toned visage. Jessica Biel and Emile Hirsche made a video while climbing up Mt. Kilmanjaro, and it reminds us of The Blair Witch Project. Courtney Cox and David Arquette are considering adopting their next child, since “it takes a lot” for the duo to procreate. “Listen, I like practicing as much as possible! But it’s hard,” Arquette explains, “I’m exhausted!”

Jessica Simpson Is Like ‘a Drug’ … in Bed