"I adjust my glasses in a way that shows that I am serious."
Rupert Murdoch, who has for ages been muttering about putting all of the content produced by News Corp. behind a pay wall in order to keep it away from Google, is attempting to force the company to change its attitude toward new media using a decidedly old-fashioned tactic: making them nervous about the competition. According to the Financial Times, Murdoch has been talking to Microsoft about being paid to remove its news content from Google’s search engine and making it available on Microsoft's search engine, the relatively uncool Bing. Says the FT:
Philippe Jannet, chief executive of Le Monde Interactif, said News Corp’s move was “crafty”. “Murdoch is playing on competition between Bing and Google. What he is doing is remarkable because it is a commercial solution. The French media, on the other hand, instinctively turn towards the state [for help].”
Course they do, the socialist bums. 
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Alberto Gonzales, pilloried for allegedly misleading Congress about the Bush administration’s warrantless eavesdropping program, has been exonerated — sort of. According to public records and interviews with federal law-enforcement officials, the Justice Department has concluded that there’s insufficient evidence to bring criminal charges against the former attorney general. His critics might groan, but they have some solace: The Justice Department’s inspector general, who conducted the investigation, concluded that his testimony before Congress about the eavesdropping program was “confusing,” “incomplete,” and had the “effect of misleading” both Congress and the public. Surely Jon Stewart can do something with that.
Bush dodges a "nightmare scenario." 
Whether it was the chubby administrative assistants (photo) or the hardworking single mom working it at the local strip club, it's clear that Danny Pang, the now-deceased California fund manager who died on house arrest while awaiting trial on fraud charges, loved the ladies. His attitude toward romance seemed to mirror his attitude toward money: The more of it he had, he seemed to believe, the better.
"No problem. I can get married and still have a girlfriend." 
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As part of NBC's "Ephemeral News Obsessions of the Year" "People of the Year" special airing this Thursday, Matt Lauer spoke to Nadya "Octomom" Suleman, Susan Boyle, and hero pilot Chesley Sullenberger, whose wife unexpectedly provided couples worldwide with a bit of helpful relationship advice. It turns out that all a guy needs to do to spark up his sleepy marriage is execute the most celebrated aircraft landing in the history of man.
Chesley says something gross in three, two, one ... 
On Saturday night, Senate Democrats squeaked by with the exact number of votes they needed to begin debate on their health care bill. But they'd prefer to not repeat that when it comes time to vote on the bill's passage. So Harry Reid and Co. have set their eyes north, on Maine.
After Saturday's vote, Reid personally reached out to Maine's GOP Senators Susan Collins and Olympia Snowe, who voted no on Saturday like all the rest of the Senate Republicans. But unlike most of their colleagues, they're not treating the Democrats's bill like some kind of second coming of small pox.
"I have ruled out voting for this bill but I still very much want to vote for a bill." 