‘Gossip Girl’ Threatens All of Its Great Loves

We open with Blair in the confessional. She is wearing a headpiece with black netting over her eyes and fuck-you heels. "After being broken up with my boyfriend for exactly twenty minutes, I succumbed to inebriation," she explains to the priest behind the screen-thingy. "I performed in a speakeasy and surrendered my virtue to a self-absorbed ass. The only good news is that he's a self-absorbed pig who will act like it never happened, thank God." The priest raises an eyebrow. "Sorry," Blair says. "Truthfully, I'm not even Catholic." Well, we are, and we don't even care that Blair took the Lord's name in vain, because this is an excellent exposition technique! We also love how it blends with the recap montage at the beginning, which happens to be the longest recap montage of any show ever. What, do they think we don't remember what happened last time? Here's a tip, CW, the people who are watching this show didn't happen to stumble upon it for the first time and think, This looks like a poignantly crafted drama I could sink my teeth into, I'll start watching! The people that watch this show are stalkerish and freaky, like us, and they have been talking about what happened last episode ALL WEEK.

Posted 11/15/07 in Daily Intel : Intel

Tags: asians, blake lively, cw, gossip girl, intel, interpol, sidekicks, steve aoki, the new york times