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Nazi Dad Expecting Another Child He’ll Try to Ruin

New Jersey Nazi Heath Campbell, who has lost custody of his four children (named Adolf Hitler, Aryan Nation, Honzlynn, and Hons Heinrich), is expecting another, just to spite us. "If it's a girl, it's gonna be Eva Braun," said his fiancée, who has also lost custody of her young child with a different man. "If it's a boy … I'm thinking Rommel." Child Protective Services probably appreciates the notice, at least.

Miami Heat Fans Leave Game Early, Beg to Get Back in After Incredible Rally, Are the Worst

The fans of the Miami Heat, despite being blessed with one of the NBA's top teams and the world's best player, have a reputation for being awful. They arrive after the games begin, and they leave before they end. They do this even during close, exciting playoff games. During Game 2 of the Eastern Conference Finals three weeks ago, an Indiana Pacers radio broadcaster summed up pretty much everyone's opinion of Heat fans:

"These losers are leaving," he said, disgusted. "They are flocking to the exits with their team down by three. This city does not only not deserve this team, they don't deserve any team.”

Last night, Heat fans did it again. 

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Serena Williams Thinks Steubenville Rape Victim ‘Shouldn’t Have Put Herself in That Position’

If Rolling Stone's profile of Serena Williams had ended a few paragraphs earlier, there might have been some buzz among tennis fans about her criticizing a competitor who may or may not be Maria Sharapova, and writer Stephen Rodrick comparing her to Kim Jong-un. However, when Roderick accompanied Williams to a nail salon, a report about the rape of a 16-year-old girl from Steubenville, Ohio by two football players happened to appear a TV screen, and Williams decided to share her breathtakingly insensitive take on the case. "Do you think it was fair, what they got? They did something stupid, but I don't know," Williams remarked. "I'm not blaming the girl, but if you're a 16-year-old and you're drunk like that, your parents should teach you: Don't take drinks from other people. She's 16, why was she that drunk where she doesn't remember?"

There's more. »

Obama’s Secret Growth Strategy

Yesterday, the Senate immigration bill received its Congressional Budget Office budget score, which is kind of like a bar mitzvah for major legislation. They did great! In budget terms, the bill would reduce the deficit by nearly a trillion dollars over its first two decades, by bringing in and legalizing younger workers, who pay more in taxes than they receive in benefits. But what the report really offers, beyond a guess at the impact on the government ledger, is a window into President Obama’s vision of long-term economic growth.

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Gilberto Valle’s Request for a Second Trial Sounds Familiar

So-called cannibal cop Gilberto Valle wants a second trial, and his reasoning sounds a lot like the defense he used in his first trial. In court papers filed Tuesday, Valle said he was innocent. "He is ‘guilty’ only of having deviant, sexually sadistic fantasies and sharing them with like-minded strangers," the filing read, according to the New York Daily News. Prosecutors have already argued successfully against a similar defense, saying Valle crossed from fantasy into action in his plans to kill, cook, and eat women. But the trial request does have one immediate effect for Valle, who faces life in prison: His sentencing, scheduled for Wednesday, will now be put off indefinitely while the court considers his latest request.

Kid-Attacking Upstate Judge Finally Resigns

It's been two years since a 15-year-old boy accused James Roman, a judge in the town of Sullivan, of berating him with curses, threatening him with a baseball bat, and breaking his bicycle because Roman thought the boy was stealing money from a farm stand he operated. Roman admitted last year to swearing the kid out and wrecking the bike (he denied the bat thing), but he's only just resigned in the face of a formal investigation. Apparently they do justice differently in Madison County.

Trent Franks’s Abortion Bill Passes the House, With One Last Gaffe

Now that Trent Franks's 20-week abortion ban has passed the House, it stands no chance in the Senate. So the debate before its 228-196 passage was probably the last opportunity for the bill's supporters (and its opponents) to get in some grandstanding on this bit of legislation. This is probably just as well for Franks, who last week said the "incidence of rape resulting in pregnancy (is) very low," to no shortage of criticism. Franks has since been sidelined, and while the commentary from representatives on both sides was less controversial this week, it was not without its batty moments.

Masturbating fetuses? »

Despite Tensions With Russia, Obama Will Propose Nuclear Arms Cuts

Here's yet another possible explanation for why Putin was shushing Obama at the G8 summit earlier this week:  President Obama mentioned that he'd like to talk about reducing their countries' nuclear stockpiles. Senior administration officials tell the Wall Street Journal that the president will announce his renewed focus on ridding the world of nuclear weapons in a major foreign-policy speech at Berlin's Brandenburg Gate on Wednesday. The U.S. and Russia already agreed to cut their number of strategic warheads to 1,550 as part of the 2010 New START Treaty, but Obama wants to reduce that number by a third.

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All Fatal FBI Shootings Were Justified, According to the FBI

In light of the FBI's assurances that it's reviewing the fatal shooting of Ibragim Todashev, a man questioned in the Boston bombing case, by an FBI agent last month, the New York Times took a look at the results of the agency's previous internal investigations. Their finding: From 1993 to early 2011, FBI agents fatally shot about 70 "subjects" and wounded about 80 others, and in each case the internal investigation found that the shooting was justified.

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