Artistic Hennessy, Iconoclastic Moonves, Mad Hot Young Patrons

We're not saying they're open to the public, and we're not saying you'll necessarily be able to get in if you show up. But here are the big-name parties on tap for tonight. Expect to hear about them in the next few days' gossip columns.

Hennessy Artistry. Capitale, 130 Bowery, at Grand St., 7:30 p.m. Confusingly truncated event title, highly enticing event schedule: Kanye West and the Strokes will perform. Kate Bosworth and Jamie-Lynn Sigler are scheduled to observe. In our notes, we had jumbled together the names of West and Strokes drummer Fabrizio Moretti as "Kanye Fabrizio." If a mad scientist were actually to combine those two people, that would be one fashionably unholy hybrid.

Iconoclasts launch party, courtesy of Grey Goose. Baryshnikov Arts Center, 450 W. 37th St., nr. Ninth Ave., 7 p.m. Iconoclasts is a TV show on the Sundance Channel that pairs up celebrities, vintage-Interview style, for weird effect (our favorite: Michael Stipe and Mario Batali). Mikhail Baryshnikov, Alice Waters, and ultimate iconoclast badass Les Moonves are expected to attend.
Cosmopolitan's 50 Hottest Bachelors of 2006. The Pink Elephant, 527 W. 27th St., nr. Tenth Ave., 7 p.m. There's one from every state! But only the fully certified ones. It's tough to be Puerto Rico.
Young Patrons Society benefit. The Allen Room, Frederick P. Rose Hall, Broadway at 60th St., 7:30 p.m. Featuring a performance by the Mad Hot Ballroom cast. "The Allen Room, Frederick P. Rose Hall" is such an unwieldy and confusing name. The phrase "you mean that one place above the mall with the huge window?" will be spoken into many a cell phone tonight.

Looking for something lower-key and more accessible? Check out all our Agenda listings for tonight, selected by New York's culture editors.