Directors! Horses! LES Hipsters!

We're not saying they're open to the public, and we're not saying you'll necessarily be able to get in if you show up. But here are the big-name parties on tap for tonight. Expect to hear about them in the next few days' gossip columns.

Only a few days in, we've already figured out that the New York party scene seems to support three distinct boldface events a night. There's one for Hollywood types, moguls, and Lou Reed; there's one for socialites, fashionistas, and their patrons; and there's one for people who surreptitiously scan Us Weekly looking for their own names. Events in this last category typically seem to be planned by people who didn't quite "get" Zoolander. Beyond these, it's all desperate gimmicks swimming in search of party reporters. Without further comment, then, tonight's events:
2006 Directors Guild of America Honors. DGA Theatre, 110 W. 57th St., nr. Sixth Ave., 6 p.m. Promised guests: Don Cheadle, Danny Glover, Helen Mirren, Taylor Hackford, Jack Valenti, Michael Apted, Julie Taymor, and, sadly, not Lou Reed.

Donna Karan "Gold" perfume launch. Donna Karan store, 819 Madison Ave., at 68th St., 8 p.m. Promised guests: Uma Thurman, Amy Sacco, Angie Harmon, Beth Ostrosky.
• The ASCA's Young Friends Horse'n Around Benefit. Lotus Space, 122 W. 26th St., nr. Sixth Ave., 9 p.m. Wearing of denim encouraged. Promised guests: Jason Binn, Tinsley Mortimer, Alison Kelly of Project Runway, Prince Lorenzo Borghese of The Bachelor: Rome.
• Grand opening of Revolver. Revolver, 210 Rivington St., nr. Pitt St., 10 p.m. D.J.-ing by members of Good Charlotte.

Looking for something lower-key and more accessible? Check out all our Agenda listings for tonight, selected by New York's culture editors.