‘Times’ Couplets: Poetic Truths in the Paper of Record

Wherein we arrange headlines from the Times in rhyme to bring you secret communiqués from the center of the universe. Today’s message: Remember the greediest.

Pfizer’s Ex-Chief to Get Full Retirement Package
BlackBerry Maker’s Profit Beats Forecast

$14.8 Million Bonus at Bear Stearns;
A Boom Year for Mergers and a Furious Pace for Law Firms

Fidelity Makes Restitution in Gifts Case:
Generosity on Display — An Artful Give and Take

Surviving These Blessings Is, Hey, Another Blessing
Comfortable Shoes Recommended. —Lizzie Skurnick