Rasputin, not Albaricci.Photo: Wikipedia.com

Rasputin was, notoriously, poisoned and shot before being drowned — and they still found water in his lungs. On Tuesday, 24-year-old Anthony Albaricci did the Mad Monk one better. He was choked with a belt, stabbed with a knife, slashed with a razor, beaten with a chair, and twice run over with an SUV — and survived. Four Queens teens are charged with attempted murder and felony assault, and there's no Count Yusupov in the bunch. The foiled execution was the result of a "money dispute," according to the D.A.'s office. Oh, and if you've noticed that the above-listed litany of assaults conspicuously lacks a good old-fashioned shooting, worry not. Somewhere between the stabbing and the slashing, one of the teens allegedly tried to shoot Albaricci at point-blank range. The gun didn't go off.

NYC Man Choked, Stabbed, Run Over But Doesn't Die; 4 Charged [AP via NYDN]