One of These Days, Sandra Day, Pow, Right in the Kisser

Members of the ten-person Iraq Study Group, which included Sandra Day O’Connor and Vernon Jordan, almost came to blows over a disagreement. Both Paris Hilton and Britney Spears were no-shows at the Heatherette show. Sienna Miller’s secret to having a nice rump in Factory Girl? Spray-on makeup. Park Chinois, the haute Chinese restaurant that was to open in the Gramercy Park Hotel, is no more. Owen Wilson ate with the boldfaced names but hung out with the nobodies at the Waverly Inn. After getting dumped by boyfriend Isaac Cohen via phone, Britney Spears went out “partying like a college girl looking to get laid.” (And how, we must ask, is that different from all other nights?)

Cyndi Lauper and Betsey Johnson used to be roomies. CNBC hottie Maria Bartiromo had lunch with boss Jonathan Wald at Michael’s. Naomi Watts is pregnant with Liev Schreiber’s kid. Russian Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov took Amtrak instead of a private jet from New York to Washington because he didn’t want to shell out for jet parking. L.A. Reid named Jermaine Dupri head of Island Records Urban Music. The National Boycott of Paris Hilton Movement petitioned Fila to drop Hilton for her use of racial and sexual slurs. Jim Carrey and Jenny McCarthy’s scooter was the victim of a hit-and-run in Miami. Big Pun’s ashes will be on display at Duvet tonight. Celebrities continue to make out at Bungalow 8. George Bush is planning on watching Pan’s Labyrinth. Charles Barkley won some money at the Bellagio. Someone stole severed body parts from the set of Hannibal Rising.