Job: Imp; currently appearing in The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee
Who’s your favorite New Yorker, living or dead, real or fictional?
Isidore Itzkowitz, a.k.a. Eddie Cantor.
What’s the best meal you’ve eaten in New York?
Currently I’m in love with the buttermilk fried chicken at Dirty Bird on 14th Street.
In one sentence, what do you actually do all day in your job?
Bite my nails and try to think of funny things.
Where do you get your coffee?
Stove-top espresso maker. Makes me feel classy. Otherwise, Starbucks.
What’s the last thing you saw on Broadway?
The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee. I watched it a bunch of times to learn the staging.
Do you give money to panhandlers?
I give money to anyone who is playing anything remotely like a musical instrument, even if that means banging a stick on the ground.
What’s your drink?
How often do you prepare your own meals?
In the mornings I make oatmeal. I have not made dinner in years.
What’s your favorite medication?
What’s hanging above your sofa?
“SOMEONE TALKED!” It’s a World War II lithograph warning citizens against leaking war plans to charming Japanese spies.
How much is too much to spend on a haircut?
I’d rather not talk about my personal life.
1 a.m. I like watching the repeat of Larry King Live.
Brunch: pro or con?
Con, con, con! Jazz brunches are especially evil!
What’s your thread count?
I don’t know.
What do you hate most about living in New York?
The cab ride out to JFK. Much worse than the cab ride back.
What’s your brand of jeans?
When’s the last time you drove a car?
One month ago.
Who should be the next president?
Mike Bloomberg. He’s post-partisan.
Times, Post, or Daily News?
Whatever shows up on Drudge. May the best articles win.
Yankees or Mets?
What makes someone a New Yorker?
Living in a sixth-floor walkup.