Last week Hillary Clinton launched an exciting! new! interactive! element on her presidential-campaign Website: a “Choose Our Campaign Song” poll on which regular voters like you get to vote for one of eight options for Hillary’s campaign song. “Don’t Stop” isn’t one of the choices, but there are two U2 choices, a golden oldie, some Dixie Chicks, and that Devil Wears Prada song, among others. What messages does each one send? We consider the choices after the jump.
“City of Blinding Lights,” U2
Original meaning: The Irishmen recall their first trip to New York City.
Key lyric: “The more you see the less you know / The less you find out as you go”
What it says to voters: Hillary’s agenda, like New York City, is shrouded in mystery. And, hey, don’t forget that she moved to New York, too!
“Suddenly I See,” KT Tunstall
Original meaning: The Scottish singer pays tribute to the unconventional beauty of Patti Smith, turning the Horses songstress into a sunshine-producing “It” girl.
Key lyric: “And everything around her is a silver pool of light / The people who surround her feel the benefit of it”
What it says to voters: Hillary Clinton is the new Mary Richards!
“Rock This Country!,” Shania Twain
Original meaning: The country-pop queen of Canada gives the United States a patriotic kick in the ass.
Key lyric: “Every brown-eyed boy, every blue-eyed girl / Gotta really go psycho, give it a whirl”
What it says to voters: Hillary is lazy; she’s recycling one of Al Gore’s presidential campaign songs from 2000.
“I’m a Believer,” Smash Mouth
Original meaning: Neil Diamond penned the love song for the Monkees. Smash Mouth sang it to an ogre.
Key lyric: “Love was out to get to me / That’s the way it seems / Disappointment haunted all my dreams”
What it says to voters: Let’s think about Mrs. Clinton’s love life, shall we?
“Ready to Run,” Dixie Chicks
Original meaning: The Bush-hating trio’s contribution to the Runaway Bride soundtrack. About a bride. Running away.
Key lyric: “All I’m ready to do is have some fun / What’s all this talk about love?”
What it says to voters: When the big moment arrives, she flees.
“Get Ready,” The Temptations
Original meaning: It’s a song about courtship from a simpler time.
Key lyric: “I’m gonna try to make you love me too”
What it says to voters: She’s the Big Chill candidate. This one’s for you, boomers!
“Right Here, Right Now,” Jesus Jones
Original meaning: In this ode to the Berlin Wall’s collapse, the British band mock Tracy Chapman for believing the poor will rise up and empower themselves. The revolution is here, and it’s called capitalism!
Key lyric: “Bob Dylan didn’t have this to sing about.”
What it says to voters: The sixties are dead. Screw you, boomers!
“I’ll Take You There,” The Staple Singers
Original meaning: The gospel family act get the word out about heaven.
Key lyric: “Somebody, help me now (I’ll take you there) / Help me, y’all (I’ll take you there) / Help me now (I’ll take you there) / Oh! (I’ll take you there) / Oh! Oh! Mercy! (I’ll take you there)”
What it says to voters: Hillary will take the country to a better place, like the Kingdom of Heaven. Or, if you’re not cool with the whole Christianity thing, she’ll just get us in better standings with the rest of the world.
“Beautiful Day,” U2
Original meaning: Another vaguely inspirational U2 epic about how life totally rules.
Key lyric: “Teach me / I know I’m not a hopeless case.”
What it says to voters: Life is good. Hillary is alive. Therefore, Hillary is good.