A Royal Pain

Prince’s highly publicized performance at the Ross School in East Hampton didn’t exactly get the crowd going. And he wouldn’t attend the after-party until everyone else left. Padma Lakshmi has been spending a lot of time with billionaire Teddy Fortsmann. Hillary Clinton has a subscription to the Post but not the Daily News. Jon Lovitz put a beating on Andy Dick at an L.A. comedy club during an argument over murdered SNL star Phil Hartman. Paris Hilton drugged her newest boyfriend with pills. Naomi Campbell gets to throw a temper tantrum in a Dunkin’ Donuts commercial directed by Zach Braff. Some staffers don’t like the cubicles and the food-paying system in the new New York Times building.

Gay-rights activist Allen Roskoff got into a fight with the head of his Jane Street co-op because she won’t return the $25,000 she owes him until he moves out of the building. Denise Rich is disembarking from her Mediterranean yacht to spend $350,000 on a four-week rental in Southampton. A Broadway adaptation of Catch Me If You Can is in the works, with Nathan Lane in the Tom Hanks role. The New York Times has written 25 articles about the iPhone, and that has nothing to do with the fact that Apple is featuring the paper in an upcoming commercial, the paper says. The Wire star Felicia “Snoopy” Pearson sold sex toys to cellmates during her stint in jail. Tom Brady and Gisele got into an argument in Napa because Tom’s ex is set to give birth this week. Elton John is opening an art gallery on his British estate. Hollywood agent and ICM co-chairman Ed Limato was demoted and stripped of his title by agency head Jeff Berg. Suge Knight wouldn’t let Paris Hilton go to the bathroom. A couple of senators heckled a Hindu priest who delivered the opening prayer on Capitol Hill. Reese Witherspoon might star in a movie adaptation of Honey West.