‘Page Six’ to Try to Take Over the World, Make It Canoodley

"Page Six" proliferated to three pages of the Post again today, which reminded us of all the rumors we've been hearing lately about the brand's plan to turn itself into an unstoppable, unavoidable, hegemonic global powerhouse. See, chief "Six"-er Richard Johnson has been interviewing celebrity reporters, editors, and bloggers over the last few weeks as part of an effort to birth a multimedia gossip juggernaut. "Essentially 'Page Six' is looking to hire reporters and editors to expand the brand on a variety of platforms, Web, television, magazine, etc.," said one candidate who was interviewed. "They think they need to extend their gossip reach out of NYC and into L.A., Miami, Vegas — maybe even Nashville." In other words, the Posties want "Page Six" the Brand to become a little bit TMZ.com, some Entertainment Tonight, and hopefully a pinch of that old lady at the Grand Ol' Opry with the price tag on her hat. We hear these plans are set to kick in starting at the end of this year. Which means the paper was actually right — the three bimbos of the apocalypse were a sign!