We're going to start today by venturing a bit off our usual beat, if only to bring you the most important news of the day: Mother Nature is still alive and kicking! Outer-borough residents were terrified last night when a mysterious creature was found wandering around the parking lot near Queens Hospital. The offending beast? A cow. “The darn thing just came out of nowhere,” Dmitri Demopoulous told the Daily News. Citizen Demopoulos, who reported the bovine sighting to 911, helped police track the creature by following him, Wesley Snipes–like, on a two-mile chase through the streets of Queens. (“It was running at a good pace for a while,” Demopoulous said.) The cow was eventually corralled on 144th Street, where she was trapped by no less than a dozen radio cars and Fire Department vehicles. Busted! No one knows where the animal came from, or where it was trying to go, so the question is how now, brown cow?
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