The Honorable Regis Philbin

At Jeffrey Toobin's party for The Nine: Inside the Secret World of the Supreme Court on Tuesday, free copies of the book were nowhere to be found, much to the chagrin of one late arriver, Regis Philbin. "I can't get my hands on the book! All the free copies are gone!" he told us, upset because he had wanted to read the book and hold it up on his show. "I don't know how the etiquette works. But usually when you go to a book party, they give you the book! Do you have the book?" We didn't. "Are you disappointed?" Welll … now that you mention it, yeah! "You should be! I think you deserve it!" Wow, Regis really knows how to rile up a crowd, we thought. And as if reading our mind, he took that moment to throw his hat into politics. “I should be on the Supreme Court,” he said.

“I have experience! At nine o’clock in the morning I get on the air and vent my views. I say my opinions. I am me! Kelly’s a good sounding board. And Kathy Lee,” he paused, “well, you know.” We wanted to point out that cameras, the Rege’s lifeblood, aren’t allowed in the Court, and that we’ve rarely heard a justice speak, or deliver an opinion that wasn’t written … by a clerk. But we thought better of it. He was so enthusiastic, so genuine in his desire to do good. And, hey, he stands a much better chance of passing the Senate than Harriet Miers ever did. —Jada Yuan