Christopher Hitchens may not have expected to snag a National Book Award last night (his atheist screed God Is Not Great lost to Tim Weiner's Legacy of Ashes: The History of the CIA in the nonfiction category), but he was in high spirits nonetheless when we caught up with him near his second-row table at the ceremony. He offered to pour red wine into our glass as well as that of a high-ranking female Kirkus editor. We both declined, as we already had other drinks in there. Apparently, his self-improvement efforts for a Vanity Fair article hadn't gone so far as quitting drinking, though he did report he hasn't smoked a cigarette in six weeks. "I'm almost 60, and I should have quit years earlier," he said, before lecturing us about the fact that, "for fuck's sake," the little buggers are evil. When we told him we felt mildly uncomfortable in his presence the day after reading about his thorough waxing for that article (in a procedure he referred to as "sack, back, and crack"), he turned to the Kirkus editor and said, "Want to feel?" She didn't see how she could turn down the opportunity. The Hitch unzipped his fly, we stood guard, and she reached in. We can't personally vouch for what happened in there (and we're ashamed to say we demurred when he offered us a grope), but the editor speculates that he's been doing some post-article maintenance down there. "As smooth as summer cherries," she said. Looks like the Hitch truly is a changed man. —Boris Kachka
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