Hank Azaria Bites Into Live, Struggling Deer

Hank Azaria
Photo: WireImage

Name: Hank Azaria

Job: Star of Broadway's The Farnsworth Invention, which was scheduled to open tomorrow but will be delayed until the stagehand strike ends. Azaria plays David Sarnoff in the historical play by Aaron Sorkin. Also, genius Simpsons voice artist.

Age: 43

Who's your favorite New Yorker, living or dead, real or fictional?
Pat Sajak. I'm pretty sure he's been to New York.

What's the best meal you've eaten in New York?
I had a tuna sandwich back in July of '78. It was pretty good.

In one sentence, what do you actually do all day in your job?
Mostly I stare folks down.

Where do you get your coffee?
Why, who have you been talking to?

What's the last thing you saw on Broadway?
I waved a fond good-bye to my Uncle Maury and Aunt Joan. They look great, God bless 'em. Maury's recovering nicely from his hip surgery, and Joan's just been a rock.

Do you give money to panhandlers?
I handle all my own pans, thank you.

What's your drink?
Fizzy lifting.

How often do you prepare your own meals?
I just bite into live, struggling deer.

What's your favorite medication?
What isn't?!!

What's hanging above your sofa?
Do you mean metaphorically?

How much is too much to spend on a haircut?
$768,000.

When's bedtime?
Depends on when daddy gets home.

Brunch: pro or con?
I won't even talk to a person who doesn't love everything about brunch.

What's your thread count?
Take Pat Sajak's thread count and double it. Nay, triple it!!

What do you hate most about living in New York?
Not enough Pat Sajak.

What's your brand of jeans?
I'd like to take this opportunity to announce the launching of Hank Azaria Jeans by Murjani.

When's the last time you drove a car?
Seriously, who have you been talking to?

Who should be the next president?
I would say Pat Sajak, but if anything happened to him, we'd be stuck with President Vanna White.

Times, Post, or Daily News?
This is like Sophie's Choice.

Yankees or Mets?
Mets.

What makes someone a New Yorker?
Most New Yorkers seem to limp.