Mike and Barack in Controversial Coffee Klatch

Mike Barack
Photo: Timothy Fadek / Polaris

Hey, while you were standing on the subway this morning with your genitals squashed up against a dude who smells like Gouda, other people were actually doing something important. Like Barack Obama and Mayor Bloomberg, who quietly had a power summit over coffee this morning. CBS reports that the meeting is about "their mutual interest." Bloomberg has long said he'd like to insert himself into the national debate this election season (BUT HE IS NOT RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT), and he met with Chuck Hagel. We have no idea what they talked about, but we imagine topics of conversation included:

• Hillary Clinton is kind of a bitch

• Rudy Giuliani is kind of a bitch

Al Sharpton is kind of a bitch

• Matt Drudge is kind of a bitch

• Is Hayden Panettiere too young to want to bone?

• George Bush is kind of a bitch

Or maybe they're in better moods in the morning than we are?

Obama, Bloomberg to Hold Mystery Meeting [CBS]