Beware the Castle Astoria

Astoria: People who live in this building get their very own Rapunzel balcony in their very own profoundly ugly castle. Call this style Middle Ages middlebrow. [OuterB via Curbed]
Bushwick: This cancer survivor who runs the music joint Goodbye Blue Monday is a cool dude. But when he says you could toss a cat in any direction around here and hit a building owned by his landlord, we hope he doesn’t mean that cute kitty he’s holding in the photo. [amNY]
Harlem: Guess which Manhattan neighborhood didn’t make it onto this (clever but not quite accurate, given gentrification) “White Folks’ Map of the NYC Subway System”? [Gothamist]

Park Slope: Slopie credit-fraud victims are trying to zero in on the local merchant where the fraud might have originated. And horror of horrors, these fraudsters have been charging stuff to un-p.c. Wal-Mart! [Gowanus Lounge]
Ridgewood: After firemen accidentally discovered a pot farm in a guy’s house, he fled. Then cops came and hauled away 217 garbage bags of doobage. Um, can we help you guys dispose of that? [Queens Crap]
South Street Seaport: Forget The Gates, now there’ll be The Waterfalls: The same Scandie artist who put a fake sun in the Tate Modern and dyed a Stockholm river green will install mini-Niagaras in the East River this summer, just offshore of the Seaport. [NYS]
West Village: Gray’s Papaya wants Bloomberg to run for president, but, technically, they’re offering free hot dogs on Inauguration Day regardless who wins. [Copyranter]